And the truth is...that I still think about you. Sometimes, when I look at the full moon, I think of the times we spent during the night safari. Enveloped in nature's embrace, who would've thought or even guess what was embedded in your heart and mind. Like a wild animal caught, I felt trapped and lashed out. Like a wounded animal, I kept returning to where it began.
Sometimes I wonder...the distant games you played were maybe games that I started. And when I decided to go forth, you retreat. There were so many obstacles. So much drama that I couldn't even begin to comprehend. Through it all what mattered was that I believed in you, until my heart was betrayed. Still, I harboured secret hopes. But then, you've clung onto another. Perhaps, patience were not your forte just as being vulnerable in another's hand not mine.
You're like a panoromic view over the waters. Reflecting the burning sun and beautiful and far beyond my reach. Am I the same for you that you keep coming back here? Serenading silently over the river's edge, ever watching.

Close brushes...

It was about 9.45am and I was on my ol white vespa scooting away anxiously. It's a Sunday morning and I had to go over to one of my director's apartment to help him fix up an ADSL modem.

The only trouble is that I've never been to his apartment before. But I knew the street he's living at. My former MD used to live in an apartment on that street. So, as I was comfortably negotiating a roundabout, this car over on another lane to my right suddenly swerved into mine! For the love of God, it almost didn't give me time to react. I slammed on the brakes praying that there better not be a 30-footer behind me. Whatever...this idiot went on making a sharp left into me!

Well...I've always wondered how it felt to be able to fly..and I got my wish.
My disgraceful landing would've made Superman shudder in his blue tights. The tar road wasn't exactly a sheet of silk. A couple of kids ran over to help me out. Clenching my teeth...the pain...the humiliation....I glanced over to the car that knocked me over. It had stopped like some 30 or 40 meters away...then I saw the driver wind down the screen and flipped one at me!!! That son of a bitch!!!

I was going to kill him...that bastard. When I started to move towards him, he actually drove off! My eyesight was shot and so I didn't get his plate number. Damn it! I was so freaking boiled up that I didn't realize those kids who helped me earlier were holding onto my arm and covering it with hand towels. I was bleeding quite badly. And then I had to sit down because I wasn't feeling too good. I was bumped around pretty good but nothing serious.

I thanked the boys for helping me out and looked at my poor...poor vespa! Thank God he was doing much better than I was. Suddenly I remembered my appointment. I'm late.
Well, I finally found his apartment and got to work. I talked to him through gritted teeth all along. The pain was getting to me. The other thing that's getting to me is that my director suddenly decided to switch the conversation medium to Japanese. I mean...I'm still taking lessons and could understand him half the time but I'm in too much pain to be thinking to put my words in Japanese for his benefit.

"Rii-za-n san, doko e omoimasu?" he started to tune into a casual conversation... I'm not sure that was what he asked but it sure sounded like it. The structure was missing something but I'm sure it was delirium on my part.

"gomen...Otsuki san..mooichido kudasai.." between the pain and fighting the wires & cables..I wasn't really paying attention to what he was asking me.

"Oro...! nanda korewa..?" he grabbed my arm. And then he asked me what happened to me. I told him while I was finishing up fixing the damn modem. He offered to send me to the hospital but I declined politely, dismissing the idea. After excusing myself, I left the apartment.

I spent a couple of hours sitting in a park absorbing what just happened to me. It was really a sucky weekend and this incident just made me realize that I could've died if I hadn't rolled in with the impact of that fucking car. And I remembered similar incidents that happened to me before. In all the 15 years of my life riding bikes on the streets, I've been really lucky. Including this, I've had so far 4 accidents. And only once did I end up in the hospital. Even so, I got away with minor bruises. Did I really cheat death during these occassions? If I did...will I get away with it the next time?

Delayed shock...I guess. I went to the theatre to watch a movie to calm myself down. It worked, even it meant I was bleeding all over the damn seat.
Close brushes, huh...?

Schism

It's been awhile since I wrote anything down in this ol blog of mine. Work had been taking most of my time.
Funny...when I took up this 5-day week job, I was thinking I might just make more time for myself. Instead, I'm finding myself going at it in the office.
I'd like to think that politics don't matter in the office and I am sure that there's many individuals out there echoes this sentiment. Lately, ignore as I might, things doesn't seem to turn out the way it supposed to. I seemed to forget one basic application of sociology in this equation we call the Office.

See, Man is a social being. Granted that many had sought solitary lives, it is in his nature to maintain a lifeline to what we call Society. His life fails in the absence of this institution that whether, he may or may not be aware, the key to his livelihood. His sanity is held intact with this knowledge that he is not all alone in his world, albeit the solitude.

Therefore, the solitary man makes up a tiny fraction of another social order, in layman terms, hermits. But I'm not talking about hermits here. I'm talking about the common society as we all know it. The hierarchy in life where we go into adulthood and maintain careers. People are constantly interacting with each other, interacting with people around him. And, by doing so, he creates a locus from within him then around him. These circles are constantly expanding throughout and we term this as the man's social circle. It had always occured to me that an expansion of matter can never be possible without the breaking of other matters. As such, as his social circle extends, it breaks down social circles of others. When other individuals enters his circle they'd either choose to stay or go away. It sounds variant but it makes sense to the adage "birds of the same feather flocks togather".

This breakdown may or may not cause distress to other social circles that are affected. It may be a violation of the highest order or it may be nothing. Whatever it is something to me who, at one point of time, believed that it may not affect my very being.

Thus, the equation breaks down right before me and I knew then that this...schism may just spell the end of an ideal concept of an ex-colleague of mine. And perhaps, I might just remain in another circle where amidst the falling dominoes, become witness of this tragedy that Man had called his game -politics.

RobinGDFellow & Mandom



yeah...yeah...yeah! This was back in the old days when Mandom & me were pirates! Swishbuckling here & there...we brought chaos everywhere!!! HAHAHA!!!!
A tribute to our brotherhood Mandom...! Cheers!!!!

It had been a hectic week and I wanted...needed to wind down. A few calls later and I'm set for a Saturday night out with my.....Karaoke buddies!!!
Yup. Dats rite. The following images depicts highly professional Karaokeers at play!


The preliminary rounds...song selections. Apparently, we happen to hire clowns to liven up the nervous karaokeers.

One of the most challenging songs of the night...

Our lady of Jules...lost in the nth level of consciousness...

Trivia of the day...? Look closely at the Tv screen...you'll see the question.